Bombers 2016-2017 Pre-Season Report

Subtractions:  Brad "the Traitor" Marchand (picture left, with his pet Bear and Jack Edwards), Denis Malgin, Nicklas Backstrom, Paul Gaustad,Matt Puempel, Michael Raffl, Tyler Ennis, Clarke MacArthur, Marc-Olivier Roy, Oliver Ekman Larsson, Tomas Hyka, Jimmy Lodge, Max Friberg, Anthony Beauvillier, Ville Pokka, Rocco Grimaldi, Emile Poirier, Joseph Woll, Mikhail Berdin, Ryan Pilon (retired), Mike Winther (retired), Frazer McLaren, Dustin Jeffrey, Mike Weaver, Luke Gazdic, Ryan Reaves, Jarred Boll, Steve Pinizzotto, Brad Boyes, Jarret Stol, Justin Peters, Rasmus Andersson, Michael Spacek, Justin Peters

 

 

Promotions:  Adam Erne, Miikka Salomaki, Frederik Gauthier, Jason Dickinson, Scott Kosmachuk, Troy Bourke, Charles Hudon, Austin Watson, Gemel Smith, Adam Tambellini, Ondrej Kase

 

In one of the busiest preseasons in Bombers history, the team finally released most of the players from its inaugural season  - only Landon Ferraro, a prospect drafted at that time remains.  The team was reshaped and reloaded to continue its pursuit in future years, chasing talented prospects, and other opportunistic players.  Knowing that the team would run into cap-pressures early on, the team made significant changes and sold cornerstone pieces to ensure that the team would be cap compliant going forward.

 

FORWARDS:  In an insignificant move, "the Traitor" Marchand thought he was bigger than the team, and turned down a big offer.  Well he can shove it up where no light shine, because Corey Perry (picture left) will easily replace him.  Can the Traitor's crappy bear survive Perry's vicious attack monster?  No.  Will that dog help the Bombers terrorize the opponents when they come into the Yara Bombshelter to play?  Heck yes.  

 

Biggest change comes from the one-for-one trade for Anze Kopitar.  While Nicklas Backstrom provided a solid power play presence, the team decided it needed a change and acquired 2-way Kopitar.  Not to be outdone by Perry's attack beast, Kopitar got his own furry attack beast (also now clearly on David Backe's good side - picture right).  The Backstrom/Kopitar swap will be a relief for the defensemen, as Kopitar actually knows where his own blue line is. 

 

Also expected to play next season is Bo Horvat who will likely take on a 3rd line center role this year, and potentially 2nd line C next year.  Emerson Etem will get a look on the 3rd line alongside Bo Horvat, because - you know, we need warm bodies to play.  The Horvat trade cost was costly, resulting in the loss of Tony "Bergeron v.4.9999" Beauvillier, and Ville Pokka.  

 

Line 4 will now be centered by Luke Glendening, who takes over that role from Paul Gaustad.  The team intends to collect 12 two-way centers to play the game - who needs wingers?  The defensive PK torch has officially been passed from Gaustad to Glendening.  It will pass eventually to Gauthier.  Bombers will look to draft another shutdown center with a last name starting with G in the future.  

 

Dick Panik was given a cheap 4 year contract just because.  All he really needs to do is just stand there and let Toews gets points.  

 

DEFENSE:  The Franchise aka the "Next Lidstrom" aka OEL got traded.  Fans started days and months of protests with this trade and did not buy that Thomas Chabot would get anywhere near OEL's greatness.  While Bombers GM would agree with the fans, reality is OEL's cap hit would have been too significant to keep around.  With Ekman-Larsson gone, Roman Josi is clearly the team's #1. 

 

David Savard will play heavy minutes, as will Jacob Trouba, each anchoring one line.  The team brought in James Wisnewski, Radko Gudas and Martin Marincin as insurance on a significantly weaker backend.  

Gudas will be relied on to concuss every opposing team's top players this year.  Bombers consider recruiting former Bombers-draft pick Daniel Catenacci for Gudas to practise concussing, but thought better of it (translation:  BFHLPA threatened a serious lawsuit).  Not to be outdone by Perry's attack-beast and Kopitar's freaking BEAR, Gudas brings along his wailing banshee (picture left).  

Yeah - look how smug he is.  He knows that the wailing banshee will keep opposition players awake at night when it's crying like the vicious predator that it is.  

 

GOALTENDING:  No significant change...other than reloading for the goalie of the future in Hellebyuck (picture right reunited with Jacob "I am not a spoiled brat like Jojo" Trouba) and JF Berube.  Schneider will continue to be the anchor.  Hellebuyck will backup this year...it's like a reverse-Luongo situation for Schneider, having to look over his shoulder for the next top goalie.  Bombers is very keen on seeing Berube as well, as either Greiss or Halak should end up getting traded and/or injured - given both of their health history.