Bombers 2021 Draft Class (FINAL)
Bombers GM will not spend much time this year describing their prospects. Why? Because he hasn't met any of them due to country borders getting closed and have only Zoom chatted with each for 1 min.
Fyodor Svechkov (C, 20th Pick, picture left) - "He’s unlikely to ever be on a powerplay unless it’s directly in front of the net, and we don’t see his skill set translating higher than a third-line forwards (sic)."
Awesome. Bombers picked a low upside offensively challenged forward, according to Hockey Prospect. Bombers really didn't have enough crappy sub-50SC players, so decided to use its first pick to take another one that will keep this team playing boring trap hockey. Truth be told though, Bombers GM was hugely inspired by Bullies taking a bottom 6 player in Boucher with the 10th spot and wanted to replicate that feeling of picking a crappy player in the first round.
Bombers GM was particularly impressed that Svechkov will join SKA, where Podkolzin played last year. SKA has this amazing development program where they sit their best young players for 53 mins a game, and give those players 7 mins of ice time (if they're lucky). The team is looking forward to Svechkov learning how to pass the water bottle around the team, as well as learning the proper Gatorade/Powerade/Poccari Sweat powder vs. water ratio. HIs 53 mins on the bench will also allow him to learn the technical skills of how to properly sharpen skates, as well as the critical NHL skill of getting sticks to pass to 50 year old teammates who suck worse than him but get way more ice time. [Sep 2021 Post Draft Commentary: Nobody else was really considered for this pick]
Francesco Pinelli (C, 29th Pick, picture right) - Who can say no to that hair. The hair alone gets him another 2-3 inches, increasing his ST stat for free. Bombers GM intends to ask Franco-boy to grow it even longer like Guile, so that he not only gains additional cushioning against any head hits, but also increase his height for the free ST stat bonus.
Hockey Prospect thinks "...there’s an opportunity for Pinelli to develop into a two-way, third line - power playmaking center." Bombers GM has in one draft managed to fortify his bottom six with pluggers with no skill. Who wouldn't be excited with this team's future prospects? At this rate, the team intends to field 12 third line players in the future. [Post Draft Commentary: Bombers considered Zach Dean and Nikita Chibrikov for this pick. Bombers were wary of the strong LA prospect list - especially how deep their centre depth is - as good players may take even longer to get a chance to play (e.g. Akil Thomas).]
Simon Robertsson (RW, 44th Pick, picture left) - Feeling the amazing quality oozing in this draft, Bombers again decided to go with some depth players who won't amount to anything. The GM got all depressed reading Hockey Prospects, since every pick in the book either are bottom of the lineup or will never make the NHL. Instead, Bombers GM tried to cheer himself up by reading Eliteprospects.
"The top of an NHL lineup might be out of the question, but Robertsson has all of the tools and gumption to hang in a checking depth role". Well, at least that's consistent - these players really do suck according to all the draft guides! Like all of them outside the top few! [Post Draft Commentary: Bombers considered Matthew Knies and Aleksi Heimosalmi for this pick.]
Aryton Martino (LW, 59th Pick picture right) - Bombers would first thank Storm GM for tampering by putting his logo on the picture to the right, but also thank them for developing the player at Guelph Storm for Bombers. As everyone knows, Guelph Storm was closed down last year due to OHL COVID protocols. Sort of also like BFHL Storm, who just packed it in for a year in BFHL to relock and reload.
After getting super depressed reading HP and EP guide books, Bombers went straight to "Mr. Everybody is an Elite Alex Ovechkin" himself - Corey Pronman, who kindly describes Aryton as "In a sentence, Martino projects to play NHL games but his size/skating combo may keep him from sticking as a full-time player." There we have it - not even good enough to play full time. This coming from Pronman who loves sub-5'11", super light players. Maybe Martino is TOO BIG at 5'11 and too heavy at 160 lbs? Who knows? [Post Draft Commentary: The team considered taking Sean Behrens to improve the D prospect pool, but ended up taking Martino, thinking that there would be decent D prospects to draft later in the draft. Unfortunately, that did not prove to be the case as the D's that Bombers wanted were taken before his turn.]
Ryder Korczak (C, 81st Pick picture left) - Hockey Prospects views Korczak as "view Korczak as a low floor player, whose ceiling isn’t as high as his talent level might suggest." Pronman thinks he will "play NHL games due to his tremendous skill, but may lack enough dimensions outside his skill to stick."
This guy is 159 lbs. He's not making it to the NHL unless he puts on 30+ lbs. Bombers GM will be force feeding him lard. That's about all we know about him.
[Post Draft Commentary: Bombers actually wasn't that interested in Korczak, but just wanted to not let him get autopicked - but after some research ended up taking Korczak over Red Savage]
Dylan Duke (C, 83rd Pick, picture right) - At this point in the draft, Bombers GM is drunk and bored and randomly throwing darts against the wall. Dylan is undersized and easily knocked off pucks. He can't skate. He is 3rd line upside, if the stars, moon, and sun all align exactly for 3.1415926535 seconds precisely in 734 days from now. Bombers expect this to be another bust, but noted that the team must draft at least one player from the USNDP every year. Fellow USNDP bust Jake Wise will have a nice spot on the bench saved for Dylan Duke as they watch the other USNDP alumns (Zegras, Boldy, Norris) actually do something in the NHL. [Post Draft Commentary: Nobody else was really considered for this pick]
Ty Voit (C, 87th Pick, picture left) - After picking all 3rd and 4th line plugs, Bombers GM decides to just say f--k it and swings for the fences, leaving all sorts of value on the table. There were still skilled players available at this stage, but the team just didn't care and decided to play roulette, but instead of betting on red or black, the team bet on 00.
[Post Draft Commentary: Bombers GM knows this is a total stretch and regrets trading up instead of keeping the late multiple 5th rounders. Players considered included Voit, Lockhart, Koskenvuo, Dower-Nilsson. Bombers GM figured there may be some inefficiencies in the OHL draft candidates, but was really intrigued by Koskenvuo as well. ]
In general, Bombers GM looks forward to seeing this sad sack of players from an absolutely weak and volatile draft turn into absolutely nothing.